Florence Nightingale, I'm Not...

Phil:  I think I know when I hurt my back the first time.  Like the therapist said, this problem has probably been in the making for a long time.
Me:  Sounds reasonable.  You've had back pain off and on for years.
Phil:  Yeah. But never like this. And never in my leg.  Man, yesterday it felt like my leg was on fire.  I've heard people describe this type of pain and now I know they weren't kidding.
Me:  I'm sorry; I know you are really hurting.
Phil:  I'm trying to figure out when I first probably hurt my back.  I think it might have been when I and two other guys lifted this huge thing of sheet metal.  Just three guys lifting sheet metal. That was stupid.
Me: How old were you?
Phil: Early twenties. But then it might have been when I lifted an oak door by myself. Not good.  I bet that's what did it.
Me: How old were you then?
Phil: Probably about 14.  I bet that's when I first hurt my back.
Me: Probably so.
Phil:   But then, it could have been the time I fell out of the back of a jeep. Did I ever tell you about that?
Me:  No, I'm pretty sure you didn't.
Phil:  Yeah.  I was riding in the back of a jeep, we were going across this open field, and we came to this dip in the ground and I fell out.
Me:  You fell out??? Of  a moving  jeep????
Phil:  Yeah. I landed on my head.
Me:  On your head!!!????
Phil:  Well, it was a big dip in the ground that we hit; it wasn't a small one.
Me:  Wow. God obviously had a plan for your life. Otherwise you wouldn't have made it this far.  What did you do?
Phil: What did I do?  Well, my friend asked me if I was okay, I said I was, and I got back in the jeep.
Me:  Men are stupid.
Phil (in pain): It's true...
Florence Nightingale, I'm not.... :)